If this day started earlier, it would have been the same. THIS DAY..........started off in a dream. The only thing I remember from that dream was someone shouting, "HEY......JOAN". I woke up. 8:44.
The bus to the hospital is at 9:10. (Actually9:30) I set the alarm but forgot to save it.
I would hope to be able to tell you something fantastic but this wasn't the day. It was the day for Joan to stand up and walk a little. It didn't happen. She can not stand straight up and leans about 30% backward making it impossible to walk. The hospital said she has been stable for 4 days and nothing new has developed so they will release her to me. The stroke was bad enough but now this also.....................................
That was yesterday.
Today she was sitting in a chair for a while. Sometimes it's like her eyes are behind her eyes and I can't see Her.
She looks at me and I don't know if she sees me.
I tried twice to stand her up but neither attempt was successful. Most of the time I'm just holding her hand It's not enough!
Gdyby ten dzie艅 zacz膮艂 si臋 wcze艣niej, by艂by taki sam. TEN DZIE艃 .......... zacz膮艂 si臋 we 艣nie. Jedyne, co pami臋tam z tego snu, to kto艣 krzycz膮cy „HEJ ...... JOAN”. Obudzi艂em si臋. 8:44.
Autobus do szpitala jest o 9:10. (W艂a艣ciwie 9:30) Ustawi艂em alarm, ale zapomnia艂em go zapisa膰.
Mam nadziej臋, 偶e b臋d臋 m贸g艂 ci powiedzie膰 co艣 fantastycznego, ale to nie by艂 ten dzie艅. To by艂 dzie艅, w kt贸rym Joan wsta艂a i posz艂a troch臋. To si臋 nie sta艂o Nie mo偶e sta膰 prosto i pochyla si臋 o 30% do ty艂u, uniemo偶liwiaj膮c chodzenie. Szpital powiedzia艂, 偶e jest stabilna przez 4 dni i nic nowego si臋 nie rozwin臋艂o, wi臋c mi j膮 wydadz膮. Udar by艂 wystarczaj膮co z艂y, ale teraz to te偶 .....................................
To by艂o wczoraj.
Dzi艣 przez chwil臋 siedzia艂a na krze艣le. Czasami to tak, jakby jej oczy by艂y za jej oczami, a ja jej nie widz臋.
Patrzy na mnie i nie wiem, czy mnie widzi.
Dwukrotnie pr贸bowa艂em j膮 podnie艣膰, ale 偶adna pr贸ba si臋 nie uda艂a. Przez wi臋kszo艣膰 czasu trzymam j膮 za r臋k臋. To za ma艂o!